"If I were to ask God why He lets poverty and injustice exist, why there are so many orphans and why He does nothing about it, I am SURE He would ask me the same ..."

author unknown

About Us

My name is Jessica and my dear sweet hubby is Kelly. We have three beautiful girls, big sis and little sis plus our newest little baby sis :) Welcome to our site where we will blog about our journey to grow our family through adoption in Africa.

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

It takes a village

No, I'm not quoting Hillary Clinton, I am sure that someone in my family, a grandparent or my mother said this long before the Clinton administration was around.

This topic has been on my mind for a couple of days, but I have always believed it, in some of shape or form. For several different reasons.

The first reason being this....we all have responsibility for the children around us. Before you get huffy, hear me out! ;) I believe that we are responsible for our sphere of influence, and if that includes any children...that means we are responsible for them. Now we each have different levels, parents and teachers of children...lots of responsibility, those who have limited time around children, have less....but we STILL have responsibility for them.

If you want to argue that point, tell me this...have you ever sat in a church during a baby baptism or baby dedication? Doesn't the congregation commit to assist the parents in raising this child up for the Lord? Uh, hello! You are verbally accepting responsibility!

The second point is that I think we have a high responsibility as parents to train up our children in the way that they should go....but do we not have all kinds of resources around us? Nope, I'm not talking about the stacks and stacks of parenting books that you have been sent my your MIL, I am talking about the people around you...yes...the village!

Please don't forget the first and best resource for parents..the Bible. There is not much more convicting or helpful when teaching and correcting my children when I pull out their little NIV reader and show them right where is says that lying is wrong....right where is says to be compassionate.

cut's like a two-edged sword...

The Word is able to speak to your children also! :)

But let's talk about the village....I want my children to respect the village, I want my children to obey the village, I want my children to seek advice from the village. But how will they do that if I don't give the village authority over my children, how will that happen with the village doesn't accept the responsibility of my children?

As I think about this, I am so sad at the state of our children these days. A specific example comes to mind. Last summer my girls and were at our neighborhood pool and we had a table close to the stairs leading into the shallow end. Now, the rule (and I am a stickler for rules!) is that children may NOT be touching the water at all during the adult breaks. This is for a couple reasons...1. the lifeguards are manning the snack stand and are not watching for the children's safety, 2. the kids need a break so that they are not over tired and are less likely to end up in a dangerous situation in the water, 3. everyone knows, if I child has their feet in the water, how easily it goes to kicking, to splashing, to ...oops, I "accidentally" fell in. So, break rolls around and my kids are sitting at the table, having a little snack; and two little girls are sitting by the pool right next to our table. One is about 3 and the other at least 8. The little one inches her way onto the steps(completely in the water) and the oldest has her feet dangling in the water as she sits on the side.

(Can I just mention, the 3 year old playing on the steps, unsupervised did not know how to swim.)

Do you know that I had to tell that little 3 year old over 4 times to get our of the water before she complied; all the while looking at me like I was growing horns out of my head?! And the older one had to be told 3 (different)times to take her feet out of the water...but the worst part was, she not only did not speak one word to me, she did not look at me like I was an alien like her sister, but she did give me the dirtiest look I have ever had from a child, like she would love to spit in my face all the while not obeying me!

This is what I am talking about....we do not teach our children that they are to obey adults. We might teach them to obey certain adults....obey your mother, obey your auntie, obey your teacher. But what about that lady you don't know at the pool...the one trying to uphold the rules at the pool, as an example for her children...and for your safety?

Are we seriously allowing our children to only heed warnings from familiar voices? What you get is a toddler that only stops running into the street when his mother calls him...but doesn't stop when the neighbor tried to stop him. How about a teenager who doesn't listen to a well-meaning adult who gives a warning about driving too fast in the rain?

This is what I don't want to happen with my children. I want them raised by the village. Don't worry, I will take on the bulk of it...but I can't watch them every second. I want to teach them that adults are to be respected, honored, obeyed.

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