"If I were to ask God why He lets poverty and injustice exist, why there are so many orphans and why He does nothing about it, I am SURE He would ask me the same ..."

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About Us

My name is Jessica and my dear sweet hubby is Kelly. We have three beautiful girls, big sis and little sis plus our newest little baby sis :) Welcome to our site where we will blog about our journey to grow our family through adoption in Africa.

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Blogging is hard...

when I'm not even sure of what exactly is going on in life or in my own head with adoption.  I haven't blogged since I had a dream about being pregnant, because well, I am pregnant.  It's so bitter sweet to write those words on this blog.  Because, as my little tracker says above, we decided to adopt a sweet little boy 2 years, 6 months, 3 weeks, and 4 days ago......

and here we are.

I would like to be transparent, but we (I) didn't want to tell the general public this time that we were pregnant because I didn't want to answer the questions of what about our adoption, and then, even with the explanation that we were still adopting, people would judge or say "yeah, right" in their own heads.

It's awful to realize how important the approval of man is.

It's one of the lies I believe on the regular basis...that that approval is important...a priority even.

I know with my head that my audience is of One, I know that He is sufficient, I know that we are told the world will hate me at times because the world first hated Him.

But my heart, well, it's nice to have approval, isn't it?

I'm a work in progress...

On to adoption stuff....we have heard from the attorney one or two times about birth moms that were right on the cusp of our family needs, but it hasn't been our child.

We've told the attorneys that we are pregnant, so that they can disclose that to birth moms.  I have no idea if a birth mom would pick us in this season of life, but I would love to have makeshift "twins."

There it is, the update....there is so much more going on in my head, what God is whispering to my heart and orchestrating in my family, but it's all too raw and uncertain to write for public eyes.

If you think of us, please pray for direction and guidance.

P.S. We are all ecstatic about this new baby due in February...it's another girl! ;-)

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